Potpourri

I've mentioned before the powerful effect presenting female has on me. Today is another good example of that. After the news I had received from my doctor on Thursday I couldn't bring myself to go the full way with how I presented on Friday. I got a shower, shaved my face, and that was it. No make up, no wig, without those I look like a female body with a male face. The whole day I was miserable but I had a lot on my mind anyway.

It's hard to say how it goes really, do I feel bad and not dress, or not dress and feel bad. It really seem like it's both, like they are their own two forces working to make me feel awful. 

Today I didn't wake up feeling any better then yesterday. I had an interview to go to today though so I had to dress to go out. I felt mostly the same until the interview was over and on my way home I started to feel a little better. I've been feeling better throughout the day too. Every now and then when I think about things I don't want to right now I slip into tears or stare off into space for a while. For the most part though I can function, far better then I was yesterday. 

I still feel totally lost, like I don't belong, as about as disconnected from other people as I could possibly be, but I guess it's not weighing as heavy today. 

It is nice going out in the public now and I can tell everyone believes I'm female. Being blatantly "sized up" by guys makes me giggle. Being in public used to make me scared, now it makes me feel better, every time I'm out I don't want to come back in. That's something that has done a complete 180 for me. I used to be a hermit, now I want to be out all the time, or have people over. I still like my alone time but I don't absolutely need it and as frequently, like I used to. 

I've been cooking all day, that usually makes me smile. I've been trying to figure out how to set up my camera to make a few cooking videos but I'm not having much luck. I thought I'd be helpful since I mentioned losing weight as one of the things for feminizing yourself. I have several meals that are delicious and you can lose weight on them, promise. Maybe I'll get into a few posts about diet and nutrition too if I ever figure out the camera.

And while I'm at it. When I did write that post about feminizing tips I had just started switching from shaving my chest and stomach to plucking. I want to say plucking is completely the way to go. My chest looks so much better now, and doesn't feel burny at all. (yeah that's right, "burny") Since I'm taking hormones as well the majority of my chest and stomach hair has started to fade and get softer as I pluck them.

I guess that's it today, I didn't want to get into the heavy stuff too much,