That being said, as a side note for those planning on FT. The main thing I did "attitude wise" about going FT was that was ALWAYS my goal. Even if the plan that day was just to dress up and walk around the block, it was practice for dressing up FT, it was getting used to being in the community while presenting FT, etc etc.
So, in no particular order.
Electrolysis. I know I said no particular order but this is first for a reason. I read from another transgender's blog that she wished she started doing it earlier in her transition and she's totally right. I started electrolysis almost right away and I didn't start with much beard to begin with compared to most men and I am just now getting to a point that make up covers it easily after a shave. It's a process, and you can't shave for the days before and after your appointment so FT has become tricksy. It hurts, it's the most expensive thing you'll have to do in Canada, besides your wardrobe I suppose, maybe, but do it soon. It sucks. If you live in Newfoundland and are looking for someone, you can contact me and I can give you the name of a very trans friendly lady to go to.
Lose weight. I am 5'6". There was once a time in my life that I was 210lbs. Awful on that short of a person. Anyway, I told everyone it was watching 300 and seeing how the men moved in that was the reason I lost weight and got in shape. That was partially true, it was also in the back of my mind that I never looked good in that lingerie because it wasn't meant for a 210lbs male. I was a comfy 155lbs before transition and I'm 145lbs now. I'd say a fair amount of the last 10lbs is the HRT, I've lost muscle mass.
Get a shower routine and exfoliate! Exfoliating is like magic, really. It'll soften up your skin like you wouldn't believe especially if you were like me and never done it once before. You'll have to be at it for a while to see a difference but you will. Now This is something that the HRT has had a huge effect on me, so I can't be a totally fair judge, but the difference is between your mothers skin and a strippers skin. Ever notice their skin feels like a baby? Exfoliating, and shaving properly is how they do it.
Shaving. Kinda obvious but I thought I'd include it. Some tips I've learned from my electrologist, don't pluck your facial hair it makes it more coarse. Do pluck your chest/abdomen they grow back finer. I just recently started doing this and it's a battle, god dammit, but I found shaving my torso felt awful, I'd get really bad ingrown hairs, and bad razor burn. I do just regularly shave my legs, pubic hair and underarms, get a female razor too. Not that there's any difference in sharpness, I found the wider base they sit in helps from slicing me up compared to a men's razor. Get one of each and look at the cartridge, you'll know what I mean. Also, shaving cream, not gel, and moisturize afterward. I use shea butter, it's nice and creamy and I like how it smells :)
Get your eyebrows shaped. It's amazing the difference your eyebrow shape can make to your face, and it has the added bonus of letting you know what you have to work with when it comes to make up. Keep them maintained yourself afterward, trust me if you're getting electrolysis, plucking/waxing will be a joke.
Makeup. Oh god where to start with this. The daunting thing about makeup to a new trans is there is SO much, where the hell do you start? And that's the trap I feel into too until I realized you don't start with the makeup, you start with your face. The biggest break through I had with my make up was I found I had "hooded eyes" basically when my eyes are open my eyelids disappear. Find out what you have, find out what skin tone you have, or guess-timate it. Makeup is a bit of a challenge for me because I'm horribly colorblind but I can read. Trust me, you'll have no trouble finding ideas online for what colors go with what sort of facial features/hair color/hair style/skin tone etc. After you learn that it's just practice practice practice. Many fits have been thrown across this room because I've touched my face one too many times with my mascara or made my lipstick worse while trying to make it better, but now I can get ready quickly, it used to take me over an hour. Oh one more huge tip. There's this stuff you can get called "Ben Nye Beard Cover" It's theatrical makeup and you can find it online for 10ish$. It goes under your foundation to cover the blue from your beard. It takes some practice but it is fantastic until the hair removal starts working.
One more. Get a wig and/or grow your hair. Right now while I'm growing my hair out my wig makes all the difference to me. Yes I know women can have short hair but, society being how it is, long hair is decidedly feminine. What I'm doing is I'm growing my hair a little longer (it's still not to my shoulders) and I'm going to get it cut and styled, and then keep growing from there.
Some advice I seen from a trans woman on youtube is to think of it like a check list. When someone looks at you they unconsciously go through a list of feminine and masculine things to decide what you are. The more checks you get on the feminine side the more you can ignore on the masculine side.
Also, not really advice for appearance really but behaviour. I used to be worried about "acting" female. Walking a certain way, moving a certain way, etc. I still do it, minimally, but I found most of those things came naturally to me. Once I feel more feminine then masculine (for lack of better way to describe it) the feminine motions, mannerisms, etc all come easily.
Anyway, I hope this helped anyone. Take care and I'll be writing again soon.
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